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April 12, 2005

"My Kung Fu is better than Your Kung Fu."

I had a great Marx Brothers moment in our house yesterday. Jack fought me closing the buttons on his shirt and was doing an admirable job of striking my hands out of the way with every attempt. No matter how fast I was he was right back to moving my hands away. I was getting frustrated and he was holding firm.

Finally I stepped back and distracted him by handing him a rattle. This bought me the minute I needed and our Shao-Lin master of Diaper Fu was dressed.

Fabulous Babe had the same experience during dinner on Saturday. Every attempt she made to get the spoon in Jack's mouth was thwarted by Jack blocking or grabbing the utensil.

A distant friend of mine, who was married to my senior Prom date for a while, once demonstrated how to grab a butterfly knive from someone doing all that silly flipping and spinning with one: "You just have to time it right." (While not the sharpest knive in the drawer he must have been reasonably good at it because he still had all of his fingers and no real scars.) Watching Jack on Saturday was like that: A blur of motion followed by a splattering of food across Jack's bib and face, a sigh of frustration from Fabulous Babe and a grin from Jack.

Fortunately the Ninja Union (Local 104) requires all applicants to be able to crawl before being accepted into the apprentice program. Once Jack manages that feat we can then have the sit down chat about long term career prospects for the martial arts, both the pros, Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris, and the cons, Steven Segal and those awful American Ninja movies.

Posted by Jim at April 12, 2005 12:16 AM


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