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April 05, 2006
"Congratulations D!"
I usually don't quote reader mail too often but here's one from a little over a year and a half ago with my reply:
Received: September 15, 2004 5:50 PM
Hi,
I just want to tell you how much I enjoy your blog.
I'm one of those strangers who stumbled upon the site and keep coming back for a baby fix. :) My niece and nephew (12 mos and 20 mos) both live out of town so I do not get to see them very often.
My husband and I (after 8 years of marriage) are in the process of deciding if this is the right time for a child or not. It is comforting to hear of others who have been or are going through the same process.
Best of luck to everyone!
D.
My reply, sent on September 15, 2004 at 5:50 PM
Dear D.,
Thanks so much for your kind note. The great reward of writing for the website is receiving letters like yours. After a long day of work coming home and finding something like this is a real joy.
Fabulous Babe's sister lives in ****** and when we were in Seattle we were dealing with a situation much like the one you describe: Two nieces for all practical purposes a few zillion miles away. To try and make sure we were memorable is part of the reason I dubbed them with the two nicknames. They may have a lot of relatives but only Weird Uncle Jim calls them Tall Princess and Number Two Billy Goat.
I can't say that there is ever a "right" time to have a child. We really sat down and weighed the pros and cons and in the end the cons simply fell away as selfish and vain. What I can tell you is that the qualms and fears of having a child soon fall away when you realize things like, "Sheesh. Those people on Jerry Springer are doing it all the time in their Trailer Parks. How bad can we screw it up?"
It sounds silly but children are a blessing that it really does take having to come to grips with how wonderful it is. This morning, 10 weeks after he was born, Jack actually recognized me and smiled. I can tell you that the moment played out again and again in my head for most of the day.
D., I hope that when the time isn't "wrong" you and your husband go ahead with having a baby. I was already pro-kid when this started and while it sounds cliché the grass is not only greener but the weeds are inconsequential and it doesn’t need to be mowed that often.
Regards and best wishes,
Jim
A reply came September 16, 2004 12:57 PM
Dear Jim,
I would definitely describe myself as pro-kid. My husband has been a little behind me in getting to this point but he is moving to this side of the aisle as well. While we both realize that there is no "perfect" time to have a child we want to be sure that if we go forward we choose the best time for us. Now that I am finished with grad school and have a permanent job one area of uncertainty has been resolved.
I truly appreciate your comments and best wishes.
They confirm what I have been thinking for the past few months.
D.
And now today dear readers…
Jim,
I'm a regular reader who loves to see pictures of Jack. I always feel a little strange, since I have never met your family in person! Thanks in part to your writings my husband and I jumped into the parenting pool. Our little guy (10 weeks old) was a bit of a surprise -- we had decided that kids were in our future but had not started trying yet. I guess it was just meant to be. Anyway, I thought I would impose on you again and say how much I enjoy reading about Jack and all of the milestones that I have to look forward to over the next few years.
Keep up the good work,
D.
So let's all give a big congratulations on the birth of young master Thomas and welcome D. and her husband to the wild and wonderful world of parenthood.
Congrats guys. I expect pictures.
Posted by Jim at April 5, 2006 03:38 PM