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July 05, 2005

"Perhaps a living as a 900 number operator?"

Ever have an accident that defies description?

On Friday I was sitting at work and swallowed. Immediately there was a sharp pain and a *pop* noise just below my larynix. From then on anytime I spoke, moved my neck or swallowed I had severe pain.

Thinking I had strained a muscle somehow I tried to just muddle through. By Sunday my steady diet of ibuprofen wasn’t doing much and by Monday I was trying not to talk. (I was also having some trouble breathing when the ibuprofen wore off.) Having put off urgent care as long as possible I finally broke down and made an appointment today recognizing that things weren’t getting better.

Doctor Molotov doesn’t work on Tuesdays so instead I got to see Doctor September. (She just eloped and was sporting that “I’m a new bride!” glow that is cute to see.) After checking for swelling and looking in my ears, nose and throat she called, brace yourself, an ear, nose and throat doctor. His guess:

A.) It’s a muscle or tendon that has either strained, sprained or torn. (Painful but it will heal eventually.)

B.) One of my vocal cords has strained, sprained or torn. (Possibly long term effects. Ugh.)

They’ve prescribed Hydrocodone (Vicodin) for the pain. (It helps some but it's so strong that I can still feel pain through the fog.) If things aren’t better by Thursday they want to scope me to see what is going on. I had more swelling problems last night and that’s not much fun.

Right now my voice borders between Barry White and a rasping squeek which is worthless at work. On top of this my new sexy, husky, dulcet tones haven’t effected Fabulous Babe in any way: she still manages to resist me. Curses.

Posted by Jim at July 5, 2005 11:31 PM


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